I was so frustrated on Friday night about grad school and the troubles I’d been having with it… I cried in my honey’s arms for a long time after we met up for dinner. I hadn’t realized that it was affecting me *that* much and thank God for him being there. I kept apologizing and he said “If I only loved you at your best, that would be wrong.”
After crying and calming down, I brought up moving in together. It was really scary for me.
He replied, “Okay, lets do it.”
I was in shock. I pointed out that he never brought it up and he said that he always brought it up but more in an abstract sense (“we’ll live together one day”). He smiled and, while hugging me tightly, said, “What part of I’m going to marry you and have kids with you don’t you understand? This implies that we are going to live together first.” He’s always been okay with it (in his defense, he HAS brought it up often but not in specifics like I did); I get the sense that he was just waiting for me to bring it up. He doesn’t want to pressure me into anything that I do. He always says “whatever you want, baby” when I’m trying to make a decision. I’m so lucky to have a partner who highly respects my judgment. Not that he’s a pushover–he’s more than happy to point out if I did something stupid or dangerous..
Over the weekend, we have been slowly talking about the challenges that we will have. I don’t want to move in at his place because its not very bus friendly and its far from my university. We are obviously not moving into my apartment because I can only have one person there in my lease plus it is too small for honey and I. I’m excited to go house/apt-hunting with him because it will be “our” place, not just my or his place. We also have drastically different ideas of what is “clean” and what is “messy.” He is the messy one but he said he will work on it. I tend to cook a lot, he doesnt. We also can’t move in until June/July because of our yearly leases on our respective places…
But thats okay. My honey is not used to change, and so the 9-10 months will be good for him to mentally prepare.
I’m trying to alleviate my semi-depression by sleeping at his place an extra night on Sunday night. It totally worked for last night and I might make a habit of it. The boyfriend is more than ecstatic about it and I am thinking of it as “training” for when we live together.
I can see a lot of battles and frustrations in our potential one-year stint of living together but it will be worth it. I enjoy his company so much that I am willing to go through all that.